The '021 Doomy Awards presented by 3am Revelations
It’s that time of year again. The time where I assume you care as little about year-end best-of lists as I do. I don’t know about you, but I usually glance at them with a vague sense of disagreement before maybe complaining... then completely forgetting about them. Besides, who actually enjoys ranking art? So as is now tradition, that's where The 3am Awards come in. In lieu of a “best of” list, I give you the award show you may not have even known you were waiting for:
The '021 Doomy Awards presented by 3am Revelations
Awarded for Outstanding Musical Musicianship in the Field of Music
These awards take a look at this year in music and honour the deserving songs, albums, and artists in the form of goofy award categories, as chosen by me (Kirk). And even though some awards may be a little silly, these are legitimately some of my favourites of the year. Where possible, all artist links are to their bandcamp pages or direct websites, where you can/should go listen to and purchase these songs & albums!
So without further ado, and in no particular order...
Best Use of a Kitty in a Song
"Solace" by Kylie V, off the album Big Blue
Best Song About Misplacing an Important Item (That Was Only on Loan From a Friend)
"Samurai Sword" by Chad VanGaalen, off the album World's Most Stressed Out Gardener
Song I Most Want Mashed Up With "99 Luftballons" by Nena
"99 To The Moon" by Said the Whale, off the album Dandelion
Best Song About Characters from a 90s Sitcom
"Jerry & George" by Small Sins, off the album Volume II
Best Song About an Actor from a 90s Blockbuster
"Yung Dicaprio" by The Zolas, off the album Come Back To Life
Song That Most Sounds Like Taking A Trip Through Space (And Has the Planetarium Laser Light Show Video to Prove It)
"Cosmic Dust" by Lydia Ainsworth, off the album Sparkles & Debris
Best Song About California
"Topanga Canyon" by Ashleigh Ball, off the album Before All the Magic's Gone
Song That Should Have Been On The Soundtrack for the latest James Bond film, NO TIME TO DIE
"Honey Trap" by Kandle, off the album Set The Fire
Song That Should Have Been On The Soundtrack for the climate change satire film, DON'T LOOK UP
"Tried To Tell You" by The Weather Station, off the album Ignorance
Best Song About The Second Baddest Bitch You Think You May Have Ever Saw
"Love Drug" by Chersea, off the album Divine Comedy
Song I Was Most Secretly Hoping to be a "Weird Al” Yankovic Cover
"Albuquerque" by Nick Cave & Warren Ellis, off the album Carnage
Best Song That is Subtly About Discovering Ayahuasca
"Maudlin Days (Robocop)" by Gold & Youth, off the album Dream Baby
Best Song That is Blatantly About Discovering Ayahuasca
"Having Discovered Ayahuasca" by Spencer Krug, off the album Fading Graffiti
Most Incredulous Song Title
"Am I Just Gonna Stand Here (While You Take My Girl Away)" by Whitehorse, off the album Strike Me Down
Best Aural Equivalent to Looking Through a Kaleidoscope
"Surrender" by Royal Canoe, off the album Sidelining
Best Party Song About Watching Someone You Love Slip Away
"Get High" by Hillsburn, off the album Slipping Away
Best Song From A Fictional Musical
"Save The City" by Marc Shaiman and Scott Wittman, from Rogers: The Musical
Meilleure chanson dans une langue que je ne comprends pas
"Les lignes de ta main" by Louis-Jean Cormier, off the album Le ciel est au plancher
Most Emotionally Devastating Song, Given The News In The Last Year
"Little Star (Stars Mix)" by iskwē, off the album The Stars
Lyrics That Went Straight for the Jugular (Emotionally)
"Not gonna lie I've been fucked up,
Not gonna lie it's been a long year"
from the song "Arm in Arm" by Arkells, off the album Blink Once
Lyrics That Most Aptly Describe The Last Two Years
“Oh, I’ll tell you what I’ve learned after a while,
Sometimes at the bottom of a spiral,
It’s just more spiral”
from the song "Spiral" by Astral Swans, off the album Astral Swans
Below is a spoofy playlist of all the winners, but if you like what you hear then please use the links above to buy directly from the artist’s bandcamp page or website!